10 Signs You Are Breastfeeding

Once again I have been called to action, breast feeding action.  My journey is going well so far...except I am remembering some things that I had forgotten from those early days...

1. Odd shaped lumpy boobs from your breast pads slipping down and bunching up

2. A tell tale circular wet patch round each nipple

Delightful

3. The slightly sour milk smell that follows you round

4. Your nipples, well let's just say they won't live up to their pre-feeding glory days #ginormous.  Neither will your boobs, apart from that one glorious day that your milk came in when you had "Pammy" boobs.  Said "Pammy" boobs were no good to anyone other than a feeding  baby seeing as they hurt if you came within a foot of them.  And were likely to spray whoever with a shower of milk.

5. Your wardrobe now consists of only clothes with easy boob access.  Lots of stretchy lycra.  Not very flattering.  And generally milk stained.

6. You develop a sweaty sheen "glow" that's leftover from pregnancy. I swear breastfeeding means you run at a higher than normal temperature.  Plus you have a human radiator attached to you. Along with strategically placed muslins.

7. Your bras are no longer the pretty lacy affairs but instead massive cotton things that clip at the front to allow baby access to aforementioned #ginormous nipples

8. You are the one eating whatever you line because didn't you know breast feeding burns like a million calories?! You'll be a size 10 in no time, let's just ignore the fact that you haven't been a size 10 since you were 18 and you should probably PUT DOWN THE CAKE... anyone?  Just me then...

9. You are an expert at doing things with one hand, while clamping a baby to your chest, and retaining your dignity by keeping the strategically placed muslin in place.... most of the time. 

10. When said muslin slips you actually don't care, because the baby has latched on and FINALLY shut his eyes.  Have a good look at my no longer Pammy boobs and #ginormoua nipples.  I don't care, this child SLEEPS!