Blog everyday in May - something I am struggling with

Day 20 of blog everyday in May with Jenni and today we are about to get real as we discuss something we are struggling with right now.

Im not sure if this is good timing or bad timing; I mean I have something I am really struggling with which means content for this post, but it also means putting my feelings down into actual words on-screen for all to see and more importantly for me to see (do you have that thing that sometimes everything is so much clearer when you see words in front of you instead of thinking about them all jumbled in your head). 

Recently the boyfriend and I embarked on a long distance relationship as his work has taken him to Germany. We have done several periods of distance (which I talked about before here) so it is nothing new and we both agree that the time apart actually makes our relationship better. We also have a pretty regular communication pattern involving whatsapp and skype so it never really feels like we are that far apart; I really believe seeing the person that you are away from makes a huge difference. 

But this time I am struggling. Quite a lot. 

Maybe it's because I now feel somewhat alone in Cyprus without him here. Maybe it is because I am living alone, something which I always knew I wouldn't be great at, and something which I am currently grinning and bearing for the greater good. Or maybe because he is setting up in Germany without me and having all these exciting adventures that I am quite jealous of actually. 

Having my birthday and Greek orthodox East roll around right after he left didn't help with my mental stability either and while my friends here have been fantastic and totally supportive, I really feel the void that is now apparent without him here. 

But as with any struggle I have good days and bad days; sometimes I relish my own space and sometimes that same space highlights the loneliness I feel. 

I do have one companion left  in my little apartment that I am so thankful for.